Friday, April 23, 2010

Getting home to my Nest. Motherhood discrimination.

Dear bus driver, all the rude persons that pushed me out of the way so you could get on the bus first and especially the BITCH who complained loudly on her phone to her friend about my stroller. (I was standing right there) I am sorry if YOU "hate the inventor of strollers" right now, but that is just the way it is.

If it makes YOU feel any better I am not liking YOU very much either.

I have 3 1/2 yr old twins and for me that means a stroller. I will  probably use it longer than most because I have two children at the same age and stage of development (neither listens to me right now- I thought language development would help with that, but instead it means they can talk back and say NO). One will run off into traffic and the other into a crowded mall.

I don't use a mountain buggy or a side by side but have found an objectively small folding stoller that sits one child up front and the other down below, akin to stadium seating. In the last 3 and half years I have discovered that the world is not set up for strollers let alone twins strollers and I have made my footprint as small as can be. So much so, my stroller is smaller than most single newborn strollers or people who use their off road running/bike strollers as their primary vehicle (come on you know you don't like those people as they bombard their way down the sidewalk taking out the sandwichboard signs and cafe seats as they swagger by). Using a stroller is my ONLY choice on longer outings when I am on my own.

This was going to a be a 'nice' posting about a family outing, but it's not. The outward journey was easy, until we tried to get home in time for nap. We left for the bus stop a little after 2pm just before the afternoon rush.

One bus came, after I let some of the knapsack/tote/laptop carrying persons get on first,  it became full. We decided to wait for another bus, we would still get home in time for nap 2:30. A second bus came and throngs of boots, hightops, and heels shoved us aside and piled on, leaving no room for myself, my children or the elderly with walkers. A third bus came and again throngs of tweeners,  hipsters and young business persons elbowed their way in. But this time as the bus was filling, I grabbed my stroller and started pushing my through. Yes I was kinda bitchy- you were actively pushing me aside. Why would you not expect that I would push back? Is it because I am mother? I have children? What would your mothers' have done? Nap time was nearing and my diaper-less children were squirming in their seats, should I have stood back and taken it? NO.

So once again, Bitch, you still got on the bus right? Stop complaining and I hope that when you have children and you need to take the bus and people are passing by you because they know you are unable to maneuver like them, that YOU will remember me and what I did to assert myself. To the bus driver, don't look at me like that. I have every right to be on the bus. And all those others people that had to get on the bus right then, I needed to get home to.

A bit of a plug for Phil & Teds, this is an awesome stroller fot twins,  two children close to the same age or singles. The bottom seat comes off to become a 'regular' stroller (just incase one twin or tot # 2 decides to stay home with daddy). It is narrow and light weight. I originally bought it because of the dimensions, according to another bus driver my original stroller, a side by side was too wide to go on the bus (even though when I took it home and measured it, it was smaller than the dimensions he quoted me) but to save further hassle and awkwardness I decided to upgrade! And I was so glad I did. I can fit down most store aisles, through all standard doors, it gets on and off buses easily when they are not filled to the gills, and I can push it with one hand- yes that means I have a hand free for coffee or an umbrella! 

Check out more Fabulous Nests at Housewife Bliss and her blog about all things home, family and diva! 

photos by me.


  1. Ooooh, so angry for you, mama! Never the exact same situation, but have faced the anti-mother/anti-kid thing many-a-time and it boils my blood. Sorry that got thrown into your plan! Hope tonight is better and that the weekend is actually fun . . .

  2. I had a phil and ted and loved it! Infact I have had a bugagoo Frog (for Margeaux), then the PT (Margeaux and Sawyer), then a Maclaren (for Sawyer), and then the current Moutain Buggy (for Xam Xam), and dare I say we are getting another Mclaren for him when we move. PTs are the best, everyone is London has one, they make the most sense for busses, crowded shops et all. I am so sorry about the creature on the phone...really! Sadly we have all been there, and I always find that I come up with the best things to say long after she is gone.

  3. @Semi-Sweet, thank you Sarah, I did have a better night, I started to to think about how I literally rammed my stroller through and it made me giggle just a little bit. Probably clipped Bitch's heel as she tried to cut infront of me.

    @Housewife Bliss, I had a side by side Maclarens, also a good stroller and actually very small considering- but the pushing and maneuvering with one hand sold me! Also (3 1/2yrs ago) they were new to Canada and few people had them yet. I was the popular kid at the park!

  4. I love this stroller! I only have 7 mo old, so no need for two seats yet, but still love it! So sorry you had rude people around you today....never fun!

  5. Rude a holes suck-smile summer is coming :)

  6. It's sad that there are so many rude people around... if I saw you with this bundles of joy, i would more than happy to assist you.

  7. What a nice blog you have !! i follow you.................hope you wil come to visit my blog...............and maybe follow me too................i come back soon !!! have a happy sunny sunday with you two lovely kids !!!

    Hugs from Ria

  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

  9. Sorry to hear about your bad experience taking the bus today. When did manners go out the window? The nerve of some people!

    By the way, love your stroller, not to mention those adorable two boys contained within it. :)

  10. @Sweet and Savory, When it came to Canada I lusted after it, and though I already one expensive stroller (nearly brand new), I turned around and sold to buy the Phil & Teds.

    @Laura, Yes summer is coming!

    @Skip to Malou, There was one nice older gentleman who was not getting on the bus until I got on the bus, and the other people were pushing him aside too. I kept thanking him profusely, as he did not have to do that.

    @It's Me, Most of all the stroller is to keep them safe & lovely.

    @Daydreamer Desserts... I know manners, right?

  11. I absolutely understand your frustration--on so many levels. Anyway, I always make room for the elderly and for mothers with strollers or kiddies at their sides. I understand what it's like to have children, and I even have an inkling regarding health problems. Even though I'm 39, I've had my share of health-related issues, and call myself "elderly" as a bit of a joke to myself.

    Keep forging ahead!

  12. By the way, you asked me about my flat yellow pins. Walmart, I think. If I didn't purchase them there, then it must have been Joann Fabrics.



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